Lipstick hostage standoff ends without violence

    Yoda confronts Jabba T. Hutt and his minions late Wednesday to reclaim two lipsticks held hostage since last week by Hutt's crime boss, Evil Libby

    (Boulder, Colo.)—Two lipsticks taken hostage by blog underworld figure Evil Libby were returned to their distraught owner, smut author Pamela Clare, late Wednesday night. Both lipsticks, though reportedly shaken, appeared to be unharmed.

    The hostage trade-off occurred late Wednesday on neutral territory in Longmont, Colo., where representatives of Evil Libby, including Tattooine underworld figure Jabba T. Hutt, were met by Clare's official representative, known only as Yoda. No violence took place during the exchange, but observers say Hutt and Yoda have a past history and that Hutt appeared to be intimidated by Yoda's hulking presence.

    The lipsticks were released into Yoda's custody without incident and escorted by Yoda back to an anxious Clare.

    Yoda takes possession of two lipsticks held hostage for almost a week by Evil Libby

    "I am so grateful to everyone who pulled together to bring this hostage standoff to a happy close," Clare stated in a press release. "That's why I write romance. I like happy endings."

    Yoda shepherds his two young charges away from the forces that held them captive this week. Evil Libby had repeated made threats against the listicks, which were shaken by their ordeal but unharmed.

    Leaving the scene, dragging empty chains behind him, Hutt appeared upset by the exchange. Speaking on condition of anonymity, one source claims Hutt feels used.

    "There was very little payoff for Hutt in the end," the source said. "Evil Libby called the shots and, quite frankly, Hutt feels used. He was hoping at least for a glimpse of a Princess Leia action figure. Instead, he came fact to face with that ovegrown gnome, Yoda."

    Jabba T. Hutt, displaying the chains used to control his young captives, leaves the scene of the exchange in obvious frustration.

    Evil Libby's motives in holding the two lipsticks hostage are unclear, but analysts say her motives may have been two-pronged.

    "First and foremost, Evil Libby wanted to prove that she is a forced to be reckoned with, not just another pretty face. But second, pulling other people's strings amuses her. This was simply entertainment for her."

    But another source claims Clare and Evil Libby were in cahoots the entire time and that the affair was in truth a publicity stunt for the two of them, bringing Evil Libby a new level of notoriety in Blogland and generating sympathy for Clare.

    "Any suggested that Ms. Clare cooperated with Evil Libby in the captivity of her two young lipsticks is patently false," said Clare's representative. "Her family and her makeup bag have been through enough. We ask that you respect their dignity."

    However, sources in Longmont say Evil Libby and Clare were seen leaving a Longmont coffee shop late Wednesday night after the exchange was made, both smiling and highly caffeinated.

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